It's been a little while since I've blogged. There really isn't a whole lot to tell. He does his thing. I do mine. I don't ask him what he's doing, he doesn't ask me what I'm doing.
I'm trying to surround myself with people who I know care and/or just "get it". I've taken my therapeutic writing to a more private venue.
If I'm being honest with myself, my marriage as I knew it, is over. We've reached the point of no return. I'm not really sure how I feel about that. I'm trying to take my own advice and just take things one day at a time. I do what needs to be done. I do things I want to do. I try not to think too much beyond the next twenty-four hours. I feel like I'm repeating myself. I've said this all before.
The next step is to find something I enjoy doing and make money doing it. I've been told this really is an easy thing to do. I'm about to find out. In the meantime, I need to at the very least find a part time job. I keep telling myself that once the kids are back in school I'll be able to focus on that. Yes, I am procrastinating and avoiding. Cut me some slack! This is all new territory for me. I am a creature of habit. The surest way to wig me out is too change the dynamics on me.
My forty-first birthday is just around the corner. At one time I thought that was the most ominous thing I was facing. How wrong I was. I don't feel forty-one. Some days I feel as if ninety is looming on the horizon. Some days I don't feel a day over twenty-five. Although the body doesn't fit that image. Hey! One can pretend!
I have no idea what the hell I'm saying right now. I have a wicked case of writer's block... (I do not consider the above anywhere near my best work...)
Time to start the day...